iHere

(Moves cobwebs gently...Lovingly even)

Yeah. No use clearing them since i'm not sure i wont be on another 3-month "break" after this...sigh...At least there'll be someone/something keeping the space bizzy.

How're y'all doing? Oh. I'm good. Listless at this moment but good, generally...Not complaining aloud...Yet. LoL.

I've been around...New job. remember? Yeah. Relocated to a small town across the Niger...Love it here. I actually see squirrels and hear bush fowls...I hear they have very healthy snakes here too. (Dear Lord, Please keep them away from me. Amen.)

Work is fun. Yeah. It's attendant politics and Polemics ever present. I love it. It's what i was made to do. Doesn't feel like work...Monetizing a hobby....LOVE IT! Did i say that already? Ok.

Like play, the year has ended...Gon' put up the Christmas decor at the office tomorrow evening...woopwoop! I haven't the foggiest why i'm excited about Christmas this year...There's this tingle in my spine...Oh i know. Someone's coming to dinner :D :D

...and it's officially 15days to my birthday...wowzers! Gon' be 28 on the 28th :D :D Maybe i'll have (who now???) Sing to me...John Mayer perhaps (Crickets, Fat Crickets) Naaah...On my wishlist is a Tab. An Apple, A berry, A fire...Any will work, Thank you. God bless you. Yes You! If you dont buy it for me, it means i have to by it for myself :( Wont you rather I got some lovely clothes and gorgeous booties with all that money? Think about it oh. It's imporrant.

smh...

Is it obvious that i have absolutely nothing going on between my eyes at this moment? In fact, It seems to me that I'm babbling...Don't worry about me...Imma go back to work now...I'll have something to say when next I'm here. Guide's Honour.


(Bows out...carefully replacing cobwebs)


--
XX

To have and to hold...

It's been 3 months and 8 days since i last came up here. I know what i promised and it looks like i may be back for good.

A lot has hapened since i was last here. Quit a job. Got back on the Job. Finally QUIT. Too many emotions coursing through my body right now.

Free at last! Yeah. I've not been without work for more than 5 days at a time in the last 33 Months...It's been only 3 days and I already feel the withdrawal symptoms of not having deadlines and shit.

I got up at 5am this morning and remembered I had absolutely nothing to do...Well that is work related. sigh...I have 2 weeks to myself before I get back to working. Yeah. I GOT ANOTHER JOB. Matter of fact: I was supposed to resume in September but i was neck deep into a TV Production.

Moving back to my first love: Radio. Yeah. I'm giving TV a rest for a bit till I've sorted out some degrees and things. You'l hear, You'll hear. I haven't done mainstream radio in 5 years. I'm optimistic.

There. The last 3 months and 8 days in  a few lines.

I'm not promising to post everyday....or every other day. I promise to be as regular as possible. I'm back...For better for worse...

PS: I met a man too..Nope. Not telling. That's a story for another post.

Re-Post: Language Challenge

Hello!!!

Forgive me ;;)

I had no idea the link was screwy. My internet was so faffed over the weekend even tweeting was an issue. I didn't realize. I've fixed it and I assure you it works :D Enjoy:

here: The Challenge: AeedeeAee

Language Challenge: IF YOU LAUGH...

Heyyyy!

I know I've defaulted again. Forgive me. I'm making up for it with this audio track (HERE) of me speaking Igbo in the Sugabelly Language Challenge :D

Enjoy!

--
XOXO

My Name Is AeeDeeAee. I may be a Workaholic...

30 Day Challenge: Day 4


Hey guyss!

How goes it? I just got back from work and it feels like someone's shutting down all the "departments" of my body. I thought I'd post this before the light bulb in my head goes too.

I was faffing around the internet today looking for the perfect picture for my blog masthead design and guess what I found??

*WORKAHOLICS ANONYMOUS*

First thought was "Taaa! Tufia!" "Jump am pass" but my curious kitty took over and I dug in!

*click*

It said it "welcomes newcomers". Then it says to go through a set of 20 questions and "If you answer "yes" to three or more of these questions you may be a workaholic. Relax. You are not alone. ."
Relax??? Hia! Ok. How Do I Know if I'm a Workaholic? There was only one way to find out. Take the damn test. So I did. Imma share the results hither.

Please find below, a representation of my thoughts/answers at the time (and now):

1. Do you get more excited about your work than about family or anything else?
Answer: Sadly, Sometimes.

2. Are there times when you can charge through your work and other times when you can't?
Answer: Yes.

3. Do you take work with you to bed? On weekends? On vacation?
Answer: Yes *sigh*

4. Is work the activity you like to do best and talk about most?
Answer: Not Really...No.

5. Do you work more than 40 hours a week?
Answer: I work 10 - 16 hours, 6 - 7 days a week. Go figure. *wails*

6. Do you turn your hobbies into money-making ventures?
Answer: All my hobbies are my money makers. Hell, My current job came from a hobby.

7. Do you take complete responsibility for the outcome of your work efforts?
Answer: Sometimes, Yes.

8. Have your family or friends given up expecting you on time?
Answer: Yes. A loooong time ago.

9. Do you take on extra work because you are concerned that it won't otherwise get done?
Answer: *grits teeth* yesss.

10. Do you underestimate how long a project will take and then rush to complete it?
Answer: *insert hysterics* hell yeah. One of the reasons I left the office late today, again.

11. Do you believe that it is okay to work long hours if you love what you are doing?
Answer: yes. but it's true, no?

12. Do you get impatient with people who have other priorities besides work?
Answer: Used to...I changed.

13. Are you afraid that if you don't work hard you will lose your job or be a failure?
Answer: NO. Never how hard. I learnt early

14. Is the future a constant worry for you even when things are going very well?
Answer: well...No.

15. Do you do things energetically and competitively including play?
Answer: Uh_mm...Yes.

16. Do you get irritated when people ask you to stop doing your work in order to do something else?
Answer: not anymore.

17. Have your long hours hurt your family or other relationships?
Answer: my boyfriend...my family...my friends...Yes.

18. Do you think about your work while driving, falling asleep or when others are talking?
Answer: Used to a lot...have reduced some.

19. Do you work or read during meals?
Answer: Everyday.

20. Do you believe that more money will solve the other problems in your life?
Answer: Naaah.

*wistful sigh*

So what d'you think? Am I a workaholic?


Err...no need. I'm looking for an online meeting.


--
XOXO


P.S.

Some amazing shit!

Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

Mother Nature and all her friends

Day 3:

I'm lying in my bed. PHCN has held on to power so there's none. I'm here listening to the drone of my neighbor's genny, bikes and cars going by and yeah, the occasional aeroplane.

I'm listening hard to hear the crickets and other creatures that would naturally get busy at this time.
I hear none.

Growing up, I didn't have to look out for chirping birds early in the morning.
Cocks crowed as at when due.
Frogs croaked when it rained.
Crickets went about their business at nights
and the fireflies...they were ever present.

I don't remember the last time I saw ladybirds. I used to love comparing their patterns.
I doubt that I will recognise the scent of greenery if I perceived it.

I really should move to the country...

--
XOXO






Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

It's not just your life dammit!

Whatever I set out to write about today just got dumped onto the dung hills of inconsequential insignificant unimportant stuff. (yes! I'm allowed to say that. I'm miffed.)

I don't even remember who or what I was gonna write about before I logged on to tweet some random bullshit and heard some chick killed herself. Hung herself.

Now I've heard two stories.

Story 1: she was engaged to be married to some dude, she had a condition that entailed her having surgery which led to her losing the ability to have children EVER. (I got this via a DM)

Story 2: she was having an affair with a married dude. Wife found out and raised hell. Hubby scampers. She got dumped. (Read on a blog. The blog post has been removed though.)

Both stories ended with "...then she hung herself..."

First of all, Nobody knows how their life was concocted. Nobody has the right to take that which they can not give. Nobody has the right to take another life: self or another. NOBODY. If this view is myopic, so be it.

Secondly, I think anyone who takes their life is not just a coward but a selfish coward. I think anyone who's "courageous" enough to take their life should kindly plan for it, financially and otherwise. How dare anyone cause a turmoil in other people's lives because they couldn't handle their business? If any of those stories are true, she was very unfair to those who now mourn.

That said, it is everyone's duty to look out for everyone because unfortunately, the Nigerian society isn't into counseling and therefore a grave number of mental issues go unnoticed and untreated.

Madonna was a chick I used to know growing up. Her older brother was my friend. I only saw her on holiday. She was a cool girl. Certainly didn't strike me as one who'd kill herself. That was all I remembered of her when I heard 4 years ago that she hung herself after popping an overdose of sleeping pills. She had suffered "Postpartum Psychosis" after birthing a blue baby. No one noticed because NO ONE was watching. The hubby didn't take it seriously till she killed herself.

This case is very obvious: something snapped in her head and nobody took her seriously.

My worry is that these things do not just happen out of the blue. People don't just up and kill self. They usually protest one way or another. The signs are almost always there. I think we should be very aware of the things  going on with the people around us. This is what God meant when he said to be our brother's keeper.

Like @Makxxy said, "We were put on this earth to commune with & help each other. If you lose sm1 on YOUR watch then its on you. What contribution have u made?"




--
XOXO




Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

IB: My what If Tale...

30 day Challenge: Day 1

Sound track for the moment: Let's just kiss and say goodbye.
"I had to meet you here todayyy...there's just so many things to saaaay...Please don't ‎​stp me till I'm throuuugh..."
Well this was the song that was playing in my head while IB toyed with my ring finger
I pulled my hand away. Ok. I tried to pull my hand away but he held fast.
"Ok. What did you want to say to me? We've been here for almost an hour and you still haven't told me why you summoned me...what's up babe?"
I couldn't look up at him. Tears had taken permanent residence in my heart all week and now they were opening shop under my eyelids.
"Adaaaaaa"
What I had to say was...well...I had no idea how I wanted to commence the discussion so I said:
"You know we have to stop seeing each other."
His hands tightened around mine. We'd had this discussion about six times already. All of the time at my place or his and we ended up "back at One" after each "break up talk session"
He sighed wistfully.
"I know."

I looked up and let the tears fall freely. I was tired. Tired of holding them back. Tired of the way things were. Tired from lack of sleep. Tired from knowing I had to break up with this man with whom I was in love. Tired of not being able to grasp happiness with this man who was already bound to another.
Yeah. IB was married. No I didn't know he was married when I met him. I didn't know until it was apparent to both of us that something had happened and we had to do something about it fast. So he told me.
Wifey was abroad. Half German-half Nigerian chick. He'd met her while in school in the states and she had been so in love with the idea of "going back home" wanted to practice her igbo and what not. Sadly, she couldn't hold on. Said she couldn't stand Nigeria so she moved back to the USA. after what she described as "3 trying months". Said she was never coming back.
Top/Middle/Bottom line: He was married.
Hmmmmm.
Not in the cards.
Lord. Not in the cards. I was supposed to fall in love with a SINGLE man, get married, have children...DEar God...
I rationalised. I fought self. I cried. I asked the Lord whyyyy?? Why did I have to find love with someone who belonged to another?
I said to self: You Won't. You absolutely can't fall for a married man.
Nah.
I absolutely did. Hook. Line. Sinker. Fisherman.
I wish I could say it was the sex. We never had sex. That was what made it so pure. He would kiss my hands. Palms. Fingers. Forehead.
He'd pick me up from school when I had late lectures. He'd hold my hands when I had bad cramps.
Sigh...
A week before the summons, I had complained of cramps in my ankle. He had, in a moment of madness, kissed my foot after massaging it.
Flustered and very vulnerable, I asked him to leave, for both our sakes. At that point, I knew we had to stop it. Whatever it was.
At this time, I had already applied to stay back in E-town do my internship .
"I'll go to lagos. I'll be out of your hair for six months. I'll understand if you don't call me. I wish things were different, IB. This is reality querido. Your wife exists. We can't pretend she doesn't. Its soo strange...We aren't sleeping with each other but..."
"...we've done much more than that... I know." He interjected drawing circles in my palm "I know...we've bonded in realms beyond sex."
"Exactly que...really should practice not calling you that..." I said as I succeeded in extricating my hands from his.
"Yeah...I knew this day would come. I prayed for a miracle." Wistful sigh. "You don't have to go to Lagos. I'll stay away."
"No. I'll go."
"Can I at least help you pack? Take you to the bus park...please..?" This was classic IB.
"Yes."
Lagos didn't work eventually. I lost two months. I ended up doing just 4 months. In E-town. He was there through it. We stuck to the plan. I buried myself in work. He did same. Stayed away. Bless him.

What we had lasted all of 8 months. My fourth year in Uni. Its been 6 years since the summons. I used to sit and wonder "What if I'd taken what I could at the time?"
In retrospect, I'm glad.
We are great friends. He's moved back to America. He's divorced from Iris. He's met another girl. I hope he finds love. He totally deserves to.
We're content with our phone convos, BBM chats and gtalk chats. We sometimes ruminate on what could have been but I'm glad we have what we have now.

I'm glad I can now tell this story.

--
XOXO




Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

30 DAY CHALLENGE...I SAY AYE!

Hey guys...

(cue tears)

I have no excuse whatsoever...Or let's just say I've run out of excuses...or the unction to give excuses. good thing however is I've been reading...not as much as I would love to but under the circumstances, I hereby pat myself on the back. I'm doing good. Hopefully, I shall read all the books I have amassed in the last 2 years. So help Me God.  

I came across the "30 day challenge on Fashiondivah's blog and it sounds like a great idea.

(cue Middle finger)

Yeah. That's for my muse...for abandoning me this long and making me look fraudulent...even to my self...sigh...

I shall attempt to write for 30 days and this...

...shall be my motivation and my guide...

I may not do it in this sequence, I may not even go by the titles BUT I shall do it!

So help me God.

(the END)

--
XoXo

Once upon a time...

I was just musing...

If you woulda just seen beyond
the stubborn set chin of mine...seen the quivering little girl...

If you woulda just heard beyond the nonchalant "what??"
I would say when you'd asked me if I was avoiding your ass...

If only you didn't always mistake the shrillness in my voice for humour…

If only you'd just looked beyond the rolling of my eyes
when you'd suggest we "go out...anywhere..."

If only you could see the beads of sweat that formed on me skin
whenever you touched my arm to get my attention...
when you'd unknowingly brushed against me…or touched my hair on  your way outta the office...

If only you could hear the flutter of my heart
Whenever you said my name exactly the way I taught you to...

If you woulda just seen that your "highly entertaining, and penetratingly insightful" me
was "utterly and completely" hooked on you…

If you'd known that it was pain I felt whenever your phone rang...at the same time everyday…and when, as always, you'd look at me…and I'd smile and say "ogbeni, go home" because I'd see the caller ID is all over your countenance...

Earth to me.

Your wife.



p.s....
This is mostly my imagination...laced with some of "my Facts" :D. :D









Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

Just trying this blogging "on the go" thingy out.

If it works...
Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

MY MUSIC AND ME...

Heyyy! :-)

How's it going? I'm in one of those moods today. The one that (regularly) propels me to raid YouTube for videos older than my mother. Okay. Maybe not that bad :D

So! Here (in no particular order) are the objects of today's cognitive itches. Enjoy while I celebrate my private Requiem Mass for Lady Musica...*sniff*

***************************************

MIRIAM MAKEBA & HARRY BELAFONTE - ONE MORE  DANCE

Mama Africa. Rest her Soul. This song...The first time i heard this song, i must have shat in me panties...I think I did. I don't remember.


**********************************************************************
HARRY BELAFONTE & NAT KING COLE - MAMA LOOK AT BOO BOO

LMFOO!! If you've never heard this song, I'm glad I've sowed into your life! Dayum! the end bit is just heeebladdylarious. This song used to be my ring tone in fashion school. I used to miss a lot of calls. Nuffsaid.
(Buhahahhaaahaahahahahhaha....to be continued)

**********************************************************************
LADYSMITH BLACK MAMBAZO & DOLLY PARTON - KNOCKING ON HEAVEN'S DOOR

They killlllt it! I loved Bob Dylan's version but this version has...Soul...What can i say? I'm a Dolly Fan and a Black Mambazo grouupiiiee :D (Those Zulu/Xhosa clicking sounds get me all the time. I hear there are over 50 clicking sounds *wipes brow*)

**********************************************************************
BOBBY BARE & BOBBY BARE Jr. - DADDY, WHAT IF...?

So, I found this while I was busy looking for Skeeter Davis and Bobby Bare Jams. You know those two people that did the DEAR JOHN LETTER song? Yup. them...(I'm an oldies rat) Well, this is a sweet...a very sweet daddy - son video...

...and just when I thought I was done, I found this by BOBBY BARE Jr. and his own Daughter ISABELLA BARE...Sweetness...


**********************************************************************
PAUL SIMON - CALL ME AL
 

NOW. THIS. IS. MY. ALL. TIME. FAVOURITE. PAUL SIMON SOOOOOONG! CHUUUUUUUUNE! *OK. DEEP BREATH* Memories of this song are mostly from Radio Nigeria...I remember sitting in my Daddy's car on our way back from his office...Sigh....This video came off the Graceland Tour...

....and this one with Saturday Night Live's Chevy Chase...

...I died. Watch proceedings after the handshake :) Enjoy.




___
XX

*Whistling*

Dia. . .Monologue VI

*Tip toes in*

Hey...I've missed this place. Nope, I didn't go in search of greener pastures. I didn't go to Timbuktu, no. No, I didn't get married. I know these as true. What i'm not quite sure of is what happened to my muse. We've been "back-and-forth'ing on giving me a gig for the past year. So I've decided to call his bluff. 


I hope it was a good idea. 


I was reading through my stuff and thought i should continue my Dia...Monologues :) Here's what i came up with.


Enjoy :)

Wednesday, March 24, 2011 at 8:32pm
Location: Hers...

“…Come Closer….Come into this…“

Oh! I love this poem! (beat) Yeah….Speaks to me…and the way you read it just now makes me actually want to...come...closer...It had a sensual ring to it…(beat) (Raised eyebrow) Are you telling me something? (beat) Oh Come on! You’re 20….Surely you understand what I’m talking about…(Beat)(Scoffs) It’s Nothing. (Beat) Oh cut the Genetic Attraction Crap...!

Okay! There’s an intercourse..a discussion we must have immediately…before I say other things (Beat) Stop calling me Daddy. I’m not your daddy. You were adopted. (Beat) Yes. She’s not your Mommy. I’m not your daddy. (Beat)

(huskily) Come  on...Relax…The good part is that we can move past this daddy – Daughter bullshit and have us a party! Just you and me…Wine and music…and…(Beat) Hey! What’s wrong?? (Beat) Where are you going??  

(SLAM)


 

NB: You can read other Dia...Monologues here: I, II, III, IV, IV 1/2 and V

-XXX