Let’s play catch up – Part II

This is good.

I’m actually here writing more rubbish barely 72 hours since my last post.

I could get used to this yo.

I could actually start writing sense.

With the gobbeldygook going on in my head right now, I hope this post is coherent in the end.

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So i’ve been doing a lot of introspectin’ lately.

See, growing up, I had plans for my life...You know...how i thought my life should pan out. I wanted to be a rapper and an electrical engineer...my dad squashed that. “Nooo. Electrical engineering’s too tasking for women. Why don't you study PetroChem Engineering or something...” But i was too rebellious to go that way so i chose something else: Food Science and Technology. My dad almost had a minor coronary. He couldn’t do zilch though because he was far away in Europe. Lol. Gave me time and space to pursue my insanity with gusto. (The rapper bit died of natural causes by the way :~I)

When I became legal (Read: 18) I had it all worked out...fairytale style.

23:  good job,  good man (mmm hmm), my own home...

30: a second masters degree. All the trappings of a comfy life.

Looked damn good on paper...implementation though...sigh...

Anyway, all eez wvell in ze job and home department...My job gets more interesting by the day (not without it’s challenges but i wasn’t promised a rose garden :)) and My home should be ready in two months. (I hope, for his own sake, the caretaker ain't lying cos imma whup his bleck behind to Okija and back!) I cant wait...I’ve commissioned bookshelves already!

I’m currently working towards my first Masters degree. It feels like I’ve been going round in circles only to end up where i started...Where I always wanted to be. I just know i had to do that mulberry bush dance...some sort of preparation for today.  Yeah, GOD had other plans so i ain't complainin’.  I couldn't have pursued a masters degree in Lagos, not with the monster schedule i was operating on. Not on that salary...so it’s just as well.

As for the “good man” department...Things have been a li’l rocky recently (Currently between men . Nothing to tell jare...Don’t h-alz me :s) cos ~Good man~ in my own peculiar context means a man who’ll accept me, my career, my dog and my numerous frailties. So far, i haven’t been very successful.

Let’s not gerrit twixted, There are men. They all start off not minding that i’m independent and then end up in a beautiful dead end street called “resentment”.

They all commit a fundamental error: They try to change me.

I don’t think that’s entirely fair. I’m not trying to change you, why try changing me? To mold me into your idea of what “your” woman should be? I don't get it. I thought the expression was “warts and all”. I mean, i accept AND accommodate all your friends...dumb, smart, fat, lean and hungry...I even accept your PS3 and xBox...I don’t even rib you for not enjoying footie or for worse: being a die hard Chelsea F.Shit fan. Damn I hate chelsea! But I accept your STOOOPID blue jersey...and these are just trifling matters...aaaaargh! I’m done. Fin.

I just can’t with men. I’m not even fighting it. I’m still trying to understand womynfolk. Don’t add to my course load.

tsk tsk.

It doesn't help that my aunt expects me to announce a boyfriend everytime she calls. My mom’s just worse. I told her the last time the “M” topic reared it’s...head, “I will be found. If I’m not found at 50, then it wasn’t meant to be. Not all of us are called to marry you know..”

She cried.

I’m not trying to kill her, really. I just think i should be allowed to decide to plunge or not plunge and who to plunge with...myself. At my pace. No be me go follow the man dey de house? Abi dem wan follow me chop konkiri when time reach? Divorce isn’t an option for me therefore, i wanna take my precious time and do it right. There’s no one to blame but meself if shit gets constipated.

Things have not been all round awesome, but on the whole, I’m happy.

Absolutely thankful.

I’m not there yet but I sure as heck ain't where I was yesterday.

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XX

p.s

I have this overwhelming urge to teach. Something keeps telling me I’m cut out to teach.
I thought i hated teaching.

Sigh...

I don’t know what I’ll be teaching but I know I’ll be teaching by the time I’m 40.

p.p.s

I'm currently in the process of making an outfit. Haven't made one in months!! I'm excited. Off to do some "Sura the Tailor" duties. If it turns out right, I might show y'all ;-)

Err...one more thing...no edito. Kindly dot the 'i's and cross the 't's. Be thine sisthren's keeper ;-)

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***Where do i get these ridiculously long posts from????***

Let’s play catch up – Part I

Finally.

A post.

Its been a while. Actually, 5 back-for-good-posts long ago.

Lots going on. So much actually. Sometimes, I think too much then I remember the people who were killed in all the uprisings and the Boko Haram fiasco and i just say to myself: CHILL THE h-EFF OUT.

That does it, basically :) 

Everyday, in the last few months, i’ve woken up with “Imma blog today” on my mind. I open the “New Post” page and stare blankly at it like it were some strange thing from space.

I started out the 30 day challenge. I tried...boy did i try...God knows i wanted to finsh it. All 30 days. Unfortunately, I didn't get past day 5...Sad story.

I toyed with the idea of writing for other people...Okay i actually did write a couple but I just wasn’t “feeling” anything i wrote. I tried writing down titles hoping that I would go back and flesh them out.

Zilch.

I tried just writing without a particular beginning, middle and end in mind...You know, a story crops up in my head and I start to write from no particular angle then something happens and I abandon it and....fill in the missing words.

Sigh.

At this moment, i have a hoard of titles and oodles of unfinished projects...and little or no hope...for reasons I can’t tell...I just know lethargy's one of them.

One reason this blog hasn't closed is that I have reason to believe, on the basis of the reason I started the blog in the first place, that i’ll eventually write here at some point...I very nearly shut down last month.  

Life otherwise has been pretty much the same. I still love my Job. I still Work, Work, Work. Brain shuts off at some point. Diminishing returns. Attempts to relax by watching movies are confronted full-frontally by a migraines and smarting eyes (like now). Then i work, work, work again. Then I shut down at midnight. Then the circle comes back around.

On footie nights, i get an extra headache analyzing and giving coaching advice from the front of the tube.

I haven’t been tweeting...much.

That’s a feat.

But! I’ve been reading a lot.

Some satirical. Some witty. Some downright clinically serious.

Dave Barry’s naked Insanity.

More Insanity George Carlin’s cache of Insanely insanes.

Erma Bombeck’s absolutely Loca_Loca_Loca writing.

Cindy Chupack’s sexual sorbets and other therapies...

Sigh

It’s my wish to take a few minutes after getting through every book I read from now (ANY BOOK) and blog about it - so that it keeps the blog rolling...you know a little memento of the book...to help me recollect and...reflect...sometimes.

Let us all hope that the idea doesn’t end up in my head...and on here and that I actually go through with it.

I know I can.

Right?

Oh and I spent the last few hours trying to figure out why I dont have a bucket list and why I haven’t traveled in eons. I came to the conclusion that Le Bucket List can wait some but this chica gats travel...soon!

Brazil is already covered. 2014. World Cup. YIPPEEE!

Prayer point: May the spirits that kept me away from SA take another route. Amen.

India’s on the list. France is too. Malta...for no apparent reason. Greece would’ve been but for their issues. A few random places. I’ll probably meet some dude who no speak engleeesh and ride into the sunset in his Black 1966 Ford Mustang Convertible (Red Interior) which he bought in honour of our first date...

Hmmm. Sounds like fun now that I see it in black and white...That’s it. Those romance novels have to bounce.

More rubbish in Part II. Have to buzz off to work now.

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XX

p.s.

I know there is a lot of incoherence happening on this here...rambly narrative.

I’m trying to live with it.

p.p.s

Thanks y’all :)

At times like this here present one, i have to consciously remind myself that I'm just 28.something and "every" thing...will be A-Okay.

I know i'm right.

I know.